Contact
EnormousFun {at} gmail [dot] com

Monday, June 30, 2003

10:17 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

A long-overdue lifetime achievment award for Sean Connery.  [++link]

Saturday, June 28, 2003

11:36 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

"Listen, Arnold is great," Kennedy said. "And I never argue with Arnold, particularly when he's holding me by my ankles upside-down. But I intend to support the Democrat."  [++link]

7:06 AM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Hi everyone, sorry I didn't check in sooner, but they don't have many internet cafes in the fjords. The next leg of the road trip took us to Norway, which is much cooler than it sounds. I'm now in Tallinn, Estonia, which is sort of like Prague before all the hippies found it and the prices went up. There is a line of people three deep behind me at this place and the guy next to me is smoking reconstituted dog turds, so I will finish this up and post some cool links later. Gonna go have some boar curry tonight!   [++link]

Friday, June 27, 2003

4:53 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I blogged this guy last year when he was a crank with a home machine shop building a hot lead death ray. The world has changed, and some things apparently don't look that loony anymore.  [++link]

10:45 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

If this works, it will be cause for much celebration. But there's something about a massive database of the phone numbers of people who don't wanted to be annoyed that gives me the fear.  [++link]

10:13 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I told you so. Now stop reminding me to put my keys on the key table.   [++link]

10:08 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Dead Pool managers across the nation, take heed: He is dead, he is dead, mighty Strom is dead.  [++link]

Thursday, June 26, 2003

5:54 PM ++ posted by Anonymous ++

Let me see if I have this straight. Some young Swiss boys are trying to Wankdorf with my father but can't because of some kind of erectile dysfunction? Soccer, lord love it, is so fucking weird.   [++link]

12:43 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Noted: The new Blogger interface sucks like turbo liposuction. Movable Type here I come.  [++link]

12:17 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Oooooooh, I got a field trip to plan...  [++link]

11:20 AM ++ posted by Anonymous ++

It is astounding that no one thought of (or got caught) doing this before. Last time I saw this trick it was Pee-Wee and Captain Carl checking out Miss Yvonne!  [++link]

10:50 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Buttfucking: Now legal in Texas, over the strenuous objections of Scalia, Rehnquist, and Thomas. Come on, boys, what are you so scared of?  [++link]

Wednesday, June 25, 2003

11:35 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I check the referrer logs a lot, since I am a fussy little man. The number of people who find my site by googling for Olsen Twins fake porn has dwindled lately, but I still get several hits per week from searches on "Benazir Bhutto Fucked". Anyone willing to explain this to me is welcome to seek professional help as soon as possible.  [++link]

11:28 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Ah. Apparently the Ministry of Tea has decided that Orwell was wrong about everything.   [++link]

Tuesday, June 24, 2003

3:03 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I hadn't realized that Liz Phair was such a used-up, deluded hag. I mean, she's 36 and has a kid, and she's trying to pretend she's still attractive. Get some botox and a burqua, crone...   [++link]

2:58 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Good for you this week: Tea, the perennial fave. Although the milk-first controversy rages on.  [++link]

12:09 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

So, you're reading Achewood and there's this amusing storyline based around jazz legend Charlie Mingus and a manual he wrote for training cats to poop in the toilet. Apparently this is not made up. There's nothing like a bass player with an enjoyment of smoking weed for finding odd ways of occupying himself...  [++link]

Monday, June 23, 2003

4:29 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

As an apology for pointing out the frozen sushi, here are a bunch of easy, tasty-sounding recipes. Don't stay mad. Eat something.  [++link]

12:15 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Read carefully: frozen sushi?  [++link]

12:13 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Yeah, well, she gets to go to Sweden, but I get to go here.  [++link]

7:19 AM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Hi kids, I´m posting from the road this week. Today we are in Sweden, and our destination is Gamla Uppsala. You may be jealous now. That is all.   [++link]

Friday, June 20, 2003

5:14 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Very lo-tech but insanely cool Honda ad from the UK.   [++link]

3:17 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Girl Marries Pariah Dawg to Ward Off Evil.

  [++link]

10:04 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Lileks has a posse.  [++link]

Thursday, June 19, 2003

2:19 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

And now, your (not particularly worksafe) moment of zen.  [++link]

12:34 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Received this morning from a thoughtful EF reader in the Netherlands: Online lightbox therapy.   [++link]

10:42 AM ++ posted by Anonymous ++

Best Weekly World News cover EVER!!! And THAT, my friends, is all!  [++link]

Wednesday, June 18, 2003

11:20 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

(Ahem) Tard Blog. That is all.  [++link]

12:58 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Happy Anniversary. Pick your favorite and go exercise it.   [++link]

12:53 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I do not feel comfortable calling people Freaks as a rule. I make an exception for people who are obsessed with really dull, mainstream, sexless things, like socially democratic furniture made out of muesli tailings and wank.  [++link]

12:48 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I don't read fan fiction of any sort, because it makes me feel like a voyeur. I realize all fiction reading is voyeuristic to some degree, but fan fic really does tend to expose the writer's personal damage; it's like listening to disturbed toddlers playing house. But it's an outlet, and it's certainly no weirder or less involved than fantasy baseball. Still, pray god that the mainstream press doesn't latch on and start shrieking WHAT ABOUT THE CHEEEEEEELDRIN???  [++link]

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

1:39 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Next time we go to war, turn off your TV. Wake me up when they've found Saddam.   [++link]

12:39 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

There is more than one "rabbit" blog out there, surprise surprise. This guy gets respect for translating Elftor into French.   [++link]

11:39 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Of course, there's still plenty of opportunity for the enterprising, even in an economic shit-trench like Portland.   [++link]

11:38 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

The US job market is the worst it's been since the early 90s, according to a bunch of fuckheads with jobs. This is the essence of why I grind my teeth when I hear the words "President" and "Bush" together.  [++link]

Monday, June 16, 2003

5:30 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

A little bit of 80s classicism from Ted Rall, name-checking David Lynch's old strip The Angriest Dog in the World. Lynch can't draw for shit either.  [++link]

2:20 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

I honestly don't know whether to laugh or cry. Suggestions welcome.   [++link]

12:47 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Geraniums are the key to a new cheap and clean way of producing gold nanoparticles. Apparently this theory was not first proposed by a schizophrenic handing out mimeographed leaflets.  [++link]

12:02 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

The peace process lives on.  [++link]

11:59 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Get ready to see an adorable little Japanese Moses come down from Fujiyama and put a hard end to this nonsense.  [++link]

Friday, June 13, 2003

2:01 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

It is fascinating to observe the territorial marking behaviors of our German cousins, if only from a safe distance.  [++link]

1:59 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Happy 79th Birthday to former President George HW Bush.

Your son's a goof, by the way, sir.  [++link]

12:24 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Pair o' Skeevy Decca Tree-A-Phobia!  [++link]

11:32 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Madame Tussaud's was always creepy, but they seem to be careening towards RealDoll territory.  [++link]

Thursday, June 12, 2003

3:05 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Ave atque vale, Atticus.  [++link]

3:03 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

In other news, the Dandy Highwayman is off his meds again.  [++link]

2:02 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Ave atque, venerable one. I would like to think that you would be as appalled as I am that they listed your obit as "entertainment news".   [++link]

7:12 AM ++ posted by Mugs ++

It's almost enough to make me stop basking in reflected glory from Kindly Uncle William and make me set up my own site, just so I could have this on it. Almost.   [++link]

5:33 AM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Need some cheering up? This is kind of entertaining, in a mainstream-cute-but-nicely-drawn kind of way. I'm still forming my opinion: guilty pleasure or simple diversion?   [++link]

Wednesday, June 11, 2003

3:35 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Woody Allen is working as a pitch man for France, urging Americans to eat french fries, to French kiss and, to spend tourist dollars. I'm not sure the French understand the irony of trying to win our hearts using an American artist whom they revere and Americans consider to be a morally and artistically bankrupt sack of crap. (Even his apologists would be squicked by the notion of him French-kissing his wife.)  [++link]

2:59 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Update: Added permalinks to the blog, in response to numerous requests. (One is a number.) They seem to be working, let me know if it goes haywire on you.  [++link]

12:37 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

There's talk of setting Tony Blair up with a dedicated Air Force One sort of secure VIP aircraft for diplomatic travel. Which is to say, the Prime Minister of England doesn't have one of those. Guys, haven't you had an air force for nearly 100 years?  [++link]

12:30 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Hans Blix is losing his shit, poor man.   [++link]

Tuesday, June 10, 2003

11:43 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Millionaire "swimsuit model" Jenna and her screeching familiar from Survivor will appear in an upcoming Playboy pictorial. Just sit down for a minute, I know you're shocked. There's some nonsense about PETA at the bottom of the article, I couldn't parse it out.   [++link]

11:15 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

There's talk of banning both Kosher and Halal slaughter practices in the UK. Apparently both methods are cruel, and there isn't enough shit stirred up around Jewish and Muslim cultural issues for some people's taste.   [++link]

Monday, June 09, 2003

6:15 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Sid Vicious Action Figure. It was supposed to come with vomit in its accessory pack, but it turns out it was a choking hazard.  [++link]

3:18 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

If I was all sick and had to go to the hospital and they told me I had monkeypox, I'd smack someone.   [++link]

11:38 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Good for you this week: Chocolate Milk, big guy.  [++link]

Friday, June 06, 2003

5:10 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Holy Crap: 1st Anniversary of Weebl & Bob. Eat pie. Wanker.  [++link]

12:35 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I updated the front page, by the way. I'll start posting more mundane grumpy shite about yardwork and cleaning my new bathroom with a razor blade soon.  [++link]

12:23 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Shit. Ashcroft's got that look in his eye again...  [++link]

8:45 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

The civilized and tolerant Dutch have apparently decided to hamstring their tourist industry in order to appease their pissy, intolerant neighbors. Heartbreaking to see. That, or the're just worried about tourists who lack the famed Dutch tolerance, quote unquote..  [++link]

Thursday, June 05, 2003

10:54 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Fast, cheap, and ripping the shit out of filthy dandelions.   [++link]

5:34 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I have this conversation all the time, albeit usually by myself and very quietly.   [++link]

3:47 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Apparently it is not a punishable offense to use dopey slang that old people don't understand in your music. This should not encourage young white kids to say the word "nizzle" out loud ever.  [++link]

2:58 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Sirhan Sirhan has been watching a shitload of Law & Order reruns looking for a new angle. Good to have a hobby.  [++link]

11:18 AM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Since there are new Elftors and new Weebl to be enjoyed, I will not bug Uncle William about the old-ass brain dump on EF's front page. (It also helps that I just got two new Buffys on tape from him. Praise Bob-Hovah, Immortal God of War and Golf, maker of all that is seen and yet to be seen, for TiVo, VHS, and the U.S Postal Service.)

Sorry, ran out of coffee at work today, I'm in a mood. Maybe you couldn't tell.   [++link]

Wednesday, June 04, 2003

3:20 PM ++ posted by Mugs ++

Anybody else think there is something seriously fucked up in the world when Martha Stewart's arrest gets more airtime than this one? Sheesh, you send one authoritarian tinpot packing, and the rest of them start campaigning for Ratfucks of The Year. C'mon people, we have work to do.   [++link]

3:04 PM ++ posted by Maggie ++

Did y'all notice this? Go from Will's Gallo post yesterday to this related story, and lower down you'll find this super-obvious statement:

"No need then for a dab of Donna Crème, a new product that claims to heighten le plaisir au feminin, which has just been launched with the utmost decorum on the Croisette. Unfortunately it comes without McGregor."

Of course it doesn't include Ewan. If it did, then we wouldn't need the cream in the first place!  [++link]

2:57 PM ++ posted by Anonymous ++

I got 12! I got 12...on a YM.com poll!!! I should just surrender my penis straightaway. Oh, wait a second, Buffy STILL kicks unholy, armored, betailed, undead ASS! So it's OK, right? RIGHT?!?!  [++link]

2:53 PM ++ posted by Maggie ++

"When told of Gallo's latest outburst, Ebert replied: 'I wish Mr. Gallo a speedy recovery.' "  [++link]

1:59 PM ++ posted by Anonymous ++

"I wore the pants. I said relax. We did a dance they called
The Slacks!"  [++link]

11:45 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Spike Lee clearly doesn't watch Buffy. Or he figured there was no money in suing UPN.  [++link]

11:27 AM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Royal gas mask porn bust.  [++link]

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

1:42 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

"The only thing I am sorry about is putting a curse on Roger Ebert's colon. If a fat pig like Roger Ebert doesn't like my movie then I'm sorry for him." Vincent Gallo, Huge Cock.  [++link]

12:13 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Mr. Greenspan has told the Germans that the US economy is ready to blow up real soon. Okay, he said we've "stabilized". Sorry about the irrational exuberance, it's just a nice change hearing good news.  [++link]

12:06 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

New Pang Bros. movie being released in US soon. Excellent. The girlfriend loves to go to scary movies with me because I scream like a little girl .  [++link]

Monday, June 02, 2003

5:07 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

I'd previously missed the irony of watching old eps of Max Headroom on TiVo.   [++link]

4:24 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

What the hell is wrong with Michael Jackson? My main man?  [++link]

4:03 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

North Carolina is making an effort to rename various places and features that retain blindingly racist names from days gone by. Good work. Perhaps Virginia legislators can get on board and do something about the Powhite Parkway.  [++link]

12:09 PM ++ posted by Uncle William ++

Inspired by my Boba Fett post below, SF Blogger Jay Buckley has has gotten his mighty Flash on. Big file, probably not worksafe outside the Bay Area...  [++link]

^top^

all text and images © are dead

2004 archive
january+
february+
march+
april+
may+
june+
july+
august+
september+
october+
november+
december+
2003 archive
january+
february+
march+
april+
may+
june+
july+
august+
september+
october+
november+
december+
2002 archive
january+
february+
march+
april+
may+
june+
july+
august+
september+
october+
november+
december+ 2001 archive
september+
october+
november+
december+